A reason, a season or a lifetime
Coaching | By Stephanie Zahalka

A reason, a season or a lifetime


Have you ever wondered why some friends come and go so fast that you almost missed the whole thing?

Or you have some friends for a while but they slowly fade away …like the seasons melding into the next…
or …
quick and fast like ripping off a band-aid – which leaves you rocking back and forth in the corner wondering what in the actual fuck just happened?

And then there are those lifetime friends.

The ones that you can call out of the blue, even though it’s been years, and things are just fucking awesome and it’s like you just hung out, no dramas, just LOVE.

I find that people come and go and come and go in and out of your life all the time.

Some you get really close to, others are just acquaintances.

Some become, what seems like, soul sisters and then BOOM, one day they are just not there anymore.

No more texts, no more messages, no more likes n loves on your posts, no more calls, no more hanging out.

They take your shit and leave.

They take your endless love and advice and all the friend-y stuff you gave them and go.  Without a word.  POOF. Gone.


I used to get really upset by this because when I am friends or soul sisters with someone, I go ALL IN.

I am loyal as fuck. I will give you whatever you want. I will help you, be friends with you, listen to you, give you gifts, take you out, be there for you – give you my fucking HEART.

No holding back.  All the fucking way in.

And then… they take something from you or they just disappear  or sometimes they fuck you over and other times, no words, just gone.

Same in business – I am sure you and I both have had those amazing people come in and get everything they can out of you, and you give and give and give some more, with joy, because mates right….  and when you finally ask to be paid – GONESKY.

It hurts.  It feels yuck.  It makes you want to hold everyone at arms length, get paid up front, not want to help so much anymore – cuz it keeps ending the same…..

I used to beat myself up about it and think what did I do wrong?

Was I too much ME?

Was I not enough?

And then I remembered that saying – friends come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

It’s true.

But sometimes you can’t think of what that reason was, for those seemingly fleeting friendships – the ones that start strong and amazing and disappear just as fast.

Maybe, just maybe, YOU were THEIR reason.

Maybe you showed up in their reality because THEY needed YOU.

They called you in on a soul level and you answered.

So, rather than be sad or beat yourself up or wallowing in the feeling of unworthiness or betrayal…. BE GRATEFUL.

Be grateful and thankful that you were someone special with love and friendship and advice and ears and qualities or services that helped them.

You fulfilled their reason.

That is a much better feeling – I am a firm (like I’ll kick your ass if I hear anything else from you) believer in EVERYTHING ALWAYS WORKS OUT FOR ME.

So, even when it doesn’t seem to be working out, it’s working out.

Just as you call people in to get you where you need to go, feel the way you need to feel, do what you need to do… others do it as well.

So, THANK YOU to all those that I have called in for a reason and YOU’RE WELCOME to all those that called me in.




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